Monday, 7 August 2006

Shattered confidence ...

Ah well... that's life then. WHY? Somehow I am getting blocked everywhere from getting my Sports Therapy diploma!!! I still didn't get my First Aid Certificate yet - and I need it probably for Module 12 in December or at least for the Exam in January ....

And today I got a phone call from Gavin, the owner of ActiveX (the osteopath where I was observing) telling me that due to a previous observer he had a couple of his patients raising concerns about a 3rd person being in the room (although they have agreed to it in the first place - probably felt they cannot object?!). So ... because of that they have changed the company policy and I cannot do anymore observing.

GREAT!!! How am I supposed to get my 100 patient contact hours done? It's impossible, that's how! I am able to do some bits and bobs with the Wolves (have enough injured players) and there are no problems getting my massage practice done (heck, we have enough players with hamstring problems!!!) but I won't have anyone to supervise me ... and that scares me. And of course I won't get 100 hours. But ... suppose the Sports Rehab people will just have to accept it. I'll contact the Rugby clubs and maybe soccer or the Edinburgh Rocks or maybe some other sports clubs - which means it may take me away from the Wolves ... not sure if I can do that. Or maybe I can contact the NHS Hospitals??

Have had a fight with DH about it (misunderstanding) because I expected sympathy and hugs and all that and, DH being as he is, he was emotionally cool and provided good advice ... geesh, could have killed him at that point!!! But we spoke about things ... different personalities ... and I probably sounded too "tough" on the phone when I told him about it, so he thought I don't need a hug anymore... (MEN!!!!)

Decision is to speak to my boss tomorrow and see if I can get my hours reduced to 2 days from September to January, just to get my studies and diploma done. It would be the best solution as I won't lose out on my pension payments and regular income - which I would if I am handing in my notice (which was the plan anyway).

I just feel like a failure - first the need for IVF, then the removed tubes, then the BFN result in IVF and now that.... LIFE is just unfair ...

Feel stupid to say all that, specially with all that war going about the world .. but it's my life - and it affects me more (obviously) so I am a little selfish ... :(

1 comment:

sharonfruit said...

You are not a failure! You will get through this and you will get your diploma!

OK?!

Cool, glad we got that sorted ;o)